Meaningful Help For Troubled Teens

It's an overused analogy, but it it makes so many appearances because of its underlying truth: It's better to address the root cause of a problem than it is to merely address the symptoms. That sentiment is particularly true when applied to the issue of providing help for troubled teens.


When a teenager is going through a rough, destructive or potentially dangerous period, those who care the most about him or her will do everything they can to try to make things better. Unfortunately, a great deal of the help for troubled teens provided in these situations does very little to actually solve the problems at hand. In fact, they can often backfire. The end result? Making the situation even worse.

The kind of help that doesn't serve anyone's best interests consists of superficial efforts to resolve problems. A child with addiction is only monitored more close to make sure he or she isn't abusing their drug of choice, but there's no concurrent effort to address the real root cause of addiction. A disobedient or disrespectful teenager is sent to a paramilitary boot camp to be "scared straight," but no one bothers to look at what is really causing him or her to act out.

It shouldn't surprise anyone that we so often reach for ways to provide help for troubled teens that merely addresses the visible symptoms instead of the foundational problems. That's because digging deeper can uncover a variety of very uncomfortable issues about family matters and the teenager's feelings about his or her parents. In an effort to avoid that discomfort, either consciously or subconsciously, parents are drawn to allegedly fast-acting and simple means of mitigating the symptoms of very complex problems.

In the end, the best solution is to accept the discomfort, pain and other emotions that may be a part of addressing the root causes of a child's inappropriate behavior. It really is better to address root causes than it is to deal exclusively with symptoms. The process may be painful in the short run, but the benefits are long-lasting. That kind of root cause-focused effort is the best way to provide meaningful help for troubled teens.

Are you dealing with a troubled teenager? If so, ask yourself whether you're really trying to get to the sources of the problem or if you're working exclusively on the surface. If you think you may be dealing with symptoms, rethinking your approach.

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What Do Struggling Teens Need to Make Progress?



There's nothing more disheartening than seeing a child struggle with the kind of extreme difficulties that would challenge even the toughest adult. When we observe struggling teens trying to handle tough emotional, behavioral, or psychological issues, our hearts go out to them. We find ourselves wondering what can be done to help them.

Obviously, there is no cookie cutter solution. Every situation is individualized and what may work in one instance may not produce results in another. At the same time, there area some guiding principles that generally lead to the kind of actions that really do lead to progress for struggling teens. Let's examine a few of those principles.

First, we must remember that our focus should be on root causes of the problems, not on their symptoms. It's natural to react to aberrant behavior by trying to change the behavior via the application of external pressure. That instinct is misguided, though. The problems these teenagers face stem from deeper problems that must be addressed in conjunction with the behavior itself. It's important to look for, and to resolve, the root causes of the problems the kids are facing.

Second, we need to approach struggling teens with a modicum of respect. While still not adults, these kids are individuals and deserve to be treated that way. Some degree of paternalism in helping them isn't just understandable, its essential. However, that must be balanced with respect for their feelings and thoughts. We can't dismiss the sentiments of those who are suffering if we hope to help them.

Third, we should be sure that we're being guided by love as we work with struggling teens. Approaches from other directions rarely work as well. People can sense our motivations and if we're trying to solve a problem because it somehow inconveniences us, that won't go over nearly as well as if we genuinely have the sufferer's best interests at heart.

Fourth, we need to be brutally honest when dealing with struggling teens. That's not only part of the aforementioned need for respect, it has additional pragmatic value. When we're willing to stare at the uncomfortable truths associated with the root causes of the problems, we're more likely to find resolution. It requires courage on the part of the adults dealing with the troubled teenagers to confront the way they may fit into the problem and to recognize errors they may have made along the way. It can be uncomfortable, but it's absolutely necessary.

These are four of the principles we should use when devising strategies to aid struggling teens. Any approach based with these four cornerstones in place will have a much stronger chance of producing the desired results than one that does not.

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